Seriously, some thing is wrong with me ....mommyhood has possessed my brain. It is Tuesday night and I am sitting at Starbucks for some much needed kid-free quiet time, time to enjoy myself and do non-mom things...so what do you ask have I spent the last 30 minutes doing????
SEARCHING THE WEB FOR THE BEST DEAL ON SQUEAKY SHOES FOR BLAKE! Seriously, my kid free time and I am searching for shoes I can not afford for Blake. I need help. Step away from the mommy brain, step away.
Tuesday, March 01, 2011
Tuesday, February 01, 2011
Refreshed
Let me start by saying . . .I love being a mom... I love being a wife. But sometimes I feel like it is all consuming and I have lost that fun girl I use to be. I feel like I am always stressing about what is going on with the kids, schedules, kids temperament, family issues and so much that it weighs on me like a weight...it smothers out the fun in me because I am too busy worrying.
Mark and I talked about this and felt we both have lost a little of the fun in our lives. We feel that our days seemed consumed with schedules, errands and tasks instead of relaxation and finding things to do we enjoy. We decided the first step in getting this back is for each of us to get some down time...some Me time! We each pick a night and get 3 hours to ourselves, to read, write or do something that let's us have a break.
Tonight was my night. It started off rocky, as Mark did not have a smooth time with Blake (who is not use to being away from Mommy). But after both kids were in bed I took off on my own to starbucks where I got a lot of reading done, got to have a few conversations without a kid interrupting and enjoyed some silence. It is amazing how just a little over an hour made me feel so refreshed. I left feeling lighter, younger, more like me and less like this uptight, frowning woman I have been lately. It was nice. I hope this continues. I hope this helps me be lighter and less stressed through out the week with my family, so I can be the fun person I want to be.
Now if we could only figure a way that Mark and I can get US time once a week. I miss time with my husband that is not interrupted by a baby crying or Maddie wanting a story. I love, love, love watching us grow as parents but I really miss just spending time with my husband too.
Mark and I talked about this and felt we both have lost a little of the fun in our lives. We feel that our days seemed consumed with schedules, errands and tasks instead of relaxation and finding things to do we enjoy. We decided the first step in getting this back is for each of us to get some down time...some Me time! We each pick a night and get 3 hours to ourselves, to read, write or do something that let's us have a break.
Tonight was my night. It started off rocky, as Mark did not have a smooth time with Blake (who is not use to being away from Mommy). But after both kids were in bed I took off on my own to starbucks where I got a lot of reading done, got to have a few conversations without a kid interrupting and enjoyed some silence. It is amazing how just a little over an hour made me feel so refreshed. I left feeling lighter, younger, more like me and less like this uptight, frowning woman I have been lately. It was nice. I hope this continues. I hope this helps me be lighter and less stressed through out the week with my family, so I can be the fun person I want to be.
Now if we could only figure a way that Mark and I can get US time once a week. I miss time with my husband that is not interrupted by a baby crying or Maddie wanting a story. I love, love, love watching us grow as parents but I really miss just spending time with my husband too.
Wednesday, October 27, 2010
Titles
Tonight as I was nursing Blake before bed and listening to Maddie run around the house calling me, I began to think about the titles I have worn throughout my life. First there was daughter, which is a title that comes with love. Then there was sister, although my siblings may of felt I was a bossy pain, I loved and still love the title of sister (and sometimes Sissy). Of course there is friend which is always an honorable title. Then there came wife, this one warms my heart and gives me a great feeling of love and security. But now I have a new title...mommy. This title is something special above all the rest because it means that I brought this little life into mine and am something special to her. It really makes me feel great.
Thursday, September 02, 2010
Saturday, August 21, 2010
Bored in the Sun
Today I am having a yard sale. My hopes is to get rid of most of Maddie's stuff that I have left to make room in the basement again and to get enough money to #1-take Maddie to the Columbus Zoo next weekend for her last weekend as an only child and #2- buy a comfortable chair to nurse in.
It is kind of...no actually more than kind of...sad getting rid of all Maddie's clothes. There are very few items out that I don't specifically remember Maddie wearing...or have a cute memory of Maddie in it. It makes me miss baby Maddie that you could just snuggle for hours with out her yelling "down mommy down".
I have picked most of the super cute clothes that I am in love with to pass along to one of my dearest friends that is having a little girl. I am so excited to pass them along and see another little girl grow up in them, but at the same time I kind of want to keep all of them...for absolutely no reason at all.
Staring at the clothes I can't help but think how fast Maddie has grown up. How fast she continues to grow. She is such a little girl, or a little princess if you ask her. She has no problem vocalizing all of her opinions, wants and desires. She is so musical...sometimes even her protests are done in song. She is smart as can be, she knows her shapes, colors, numbers, ABC's and some spanish. She is such a lover, she has no problem giving unsolicited hugs, kisses and I love yous to people who are important to her...even friends. I love that. She has the memory of an elephant. The other day when going to a friends house we had only been to once before she pointed out the house to me before even I was sure where it was. It is interesting that all these things make my heart swell up with love and pride and yet break my heart at the same time... because she is becoming a little girl and not my baby.
It makes me wonder if Little Man will grow up just as fast. How him and his sister will co-exist when she insists on being the star of the show, how they will bond and hopefully become little best friends when he is old enough to play with her, how her knowledge will effect him and help him grow. I look forward to watching them together. I just wish they wouldn't have to grow up so fast.
It is kind of...no actually more than kind of...sad getting rid of all Maddie's clothes. There are very few items out that I don't specifically remember Maddie wearing...or have a cute memory of Maddie in it. It makes me miss baby Maddie that you could just snuggle for hours with out her yelling "down mommy down".
I have picked most of the super cute clothes that I am in love with to pass along to one of my dearest friends that is having a little girl. I am so excited to pass them along and see another little girl grow up in them, but at the same time I kind of want to keep all of them...for absolutely no reason at all.
Staring at the clothes I can't help but think how fast Maddie has grown up. How fast she continues to grow. She is such a little girl, or a little princess if you ask her. She has no problem vocalizing all of her opinions, wants and desires. She is so musical...sometimes even her protests are done in song. She is smart as can be, she knows her shapes, colors, numbers, ABC's and some spanish. She is such a lover, she has no problem giving unsolicited hugs, kisses and I love yous to people who are important to her...even friends. I love that. She has the memory of an elephant. The other day when going to a friends house we had only been to once before she pointed out the house to me before even I was sure where it was. It is interesting that all these things make my heart swell up with love and pride and yet break my heart at the same time... because she is becoming a little girl and not my baby.
It makes me wonder if Little Man will grow up just as fast. How him and his sister will co-exist when she insists on being the star of the show, how they will bond and hopefully become little best friends when he is old enough to play with her, how her knowledge will effect him and help him grow. I look forward to watching them together. I just wish they wouldn't have to grow up so fast.
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
31 again!
Sunday was my 32nd birthday, unless you ask my husband who keeps telling me I am 31 which totally works for me. It was an amazing birthday, full of smiles, giggles, kisses and love. Who could ask for anything more.
Mark was fighting a very vicious head and chest cold but despite how horrible he was feeling her worked hard and put aside his urge to snuggle under the covers all day to try to make it a great day for me. We started the morning off the best way...we all slept in. Then Mark got Maddie out of her crib and brought her to "wake" me in bed. She was full of smiles and excitement. I was very excited to get my last birthday present..a stovetop popper, much like the one that Melissa gave me years ago that I used until it was DEAD.
Before we headed out for the day my considerate husband wranggled the toddler while I got to work out on the treadmill for 50 minutes. One of my other AMAZING birthday presents was Mark built a shelf to house a cardio cinema and got me a tv so that I could look forward to working out. It really does make me want to work out more. I love, love, love it.
After my work out we hit the road, although it was snowy it was not too cold which was nice. We went to this mexican restaurant in huntington where we had the best nachos I have had since moving to this area. I LOVED them. Next time I want a place all to myself ;) Maddie was not a joy at the restaurant ...as nice as it is that she is walking now, the downside is she always wants her freedom and does not want to be pinned into an evil highchair. So in the end we did a dine and dash (except we actually paid for our meal) to rush a screaming child into the car. Maybe next year we get a sitter for my birthday lunch. Ha ha.
My goal this day was to get a few shirts I could wear and feel good about myself that were not baggy sweatshirts. Mark took on the task of running errands with Maddie so that I could shop on my own. Even among all the christmas crazies it was relaxing and I think I found some really great deals. However, the best part was when Mark and Maddie rejoined me and Maddie showered me with kisses as if I had been gone for years.
When we got home we gave Maddie her kitchen set ...she loved it and watching her play with it was a great birthday gift to myself. She was so happy and had so much fun. I got so much laughter out of her and kisses. It made me think about being 32...or 31 again...really look at my life and realize how amazing it is. I have a wonderful, sweet, considerate husband who loves to spend time with us, he still leaves me love notes and I get random I love yous throughout the day. He loves to make us happy and I love to make him happy. I have an amazing daughter who is so much fun to watch grow. I want to spend every second just enjoying her silly little smiles and games. Who wouldn't love this life.
I hope every birthday can be as joyful as this one was.
Friday, December 11, 2009
Insomnia
Tonight I just can't sleep. I do not know what it is, I am exhausted but my mind won't rest. So instead I have uploaded pictures, videos, emailed friends, played games, worked on my meetup.com sight and revised and added things to my playgroup site. The site has a LOT more work to be done on it before we can drop Meetup.com and just use it but I am still quite proud of it. Check it out.
http://playgroup.justholly.com/
Okay it is now 3:30am and I better force myself to sleep...anyone want to send a little sleep dust my way. :)
http://playgroup.justholly.com/
Okay it is now 3:30am and I better force myself to sleep...anyone want to send a little sleep dust my way. :)
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